Sunday, September 23, 2007

When the lovelesscynic has to attend bullshit orientation activities,

she gets angry. So this guy came in to teach us about different types of leadership styles. Which I'm already not into. But he comes in and uses Tibetan prayer bells to signal when he's going to end the activity. And talks about how he went to some college for graduate school founded by a Tibetan monk. (So you already know what I'm thinking.)

But then he introduces the leadership styles. And there are four, says him. Based on the directions of a compass. North=forceful, decisive. West=logical, analytical. East=mystical, visionary. South= emotional, feeling based.

Now, I had to spend 4 plus hours listening to this guy. But at a certain point, I figured something out. The Leadership Compass is totally racist! Why are the North and West points of the compass weighted towards rational thinking and decisive action. Whereas the Southern part is ruled by irrational emotions. And the mystical East, well, we all know what I think about the mystical East.

Racism and foul play is afoot. Not to mention some major cultural appropriation. There was also an Insufferable Gandhi Story. Which is almost as unbearable as an Insufferable Mother Teresa Story. I felt an overwhelming desire to read him Salman Rushdie's essay on Gandhi just to shut him up.

And this at an AmeriCorps orientation no less.

Over and out.


nien said...

i sat through the same thing! except for OCA!

but this is what they really mean:

the eastern leaders are a bunch of slackers.

the northern leaders are assholes.

the western leaders are uninspiring.

the south leaders are a bunch of fuckin' fairies.

Magniloquence said...


That's standard AmeriCorps stuff. I got it in Teach for America, and they're an Americorps branch/affiliate/somethingorother. (Ours were a little less blatant, though, and included the pitfalls of each one along with the virtues.)

I hadn't even thought about it that way. Mostly it reminded me of the eleventy million other ones I've had to sit through in leadership thingees.

We had to go stand in the direction that best described our style. Pretty much my entire group went North, with a wee contingent in the west, and me looking bewildered in the southeastwest.

nien said...

magniloquence is an uninspiring fairy-slacker.

Factorial said...

But I bet nobody asked you if you're Native American.